Solo Mother

I wish all you solomothers out there, all you women who work so hard to make your homes, your children, your lives, your significant other’s life beautiful, I wish you joy. I wish you love. I wish you three more child-free hours to sleep tomorrow.
I’m dolled up. I’m feeling sexy and alive. I’m going to a friend’s bar to eat sushi and ring in the New Year. I’m hoping to be kissed when we roll around to 2007. I’m going to dance. I’m going to be joyous. I’m going to be thankful that I’m alive.
And even more thankful that the …read more

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this perfect dandylion shook its white mane at us on our way home from a holiday party this evening, and my son’s joy at being able to blow blow blow was as great as any smile he’d bestowed to gifts on Christmas morning.
When I think that we went from having nothing to having it all in just three short months? I weep. I think our home is complete. I am still sleeping on the floor–on a mattress–but we have everything we could want. Well, another set of sheets for each of the beds would be nice, but I don’t mind …read more

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The King of Everything and I miss school. It’s not school so much, persay, as we’ve been having a great time being vacation bums and playing with all the wonderful toys he got for Christmas. We miss the underlying structure that school gives us: up at a certain time, out the door, walk to school, etc. We’re kind of sloppy right now. Breakfast doesn’t happen when it should, and we can stay in our pj’s all day if we’ve half a mind. And let me tell you, when I’m not working full time, I feel like I’ve got about half …read more

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Ohhh, ladies. I’d promised an interview with a gentleman who seems to gravitate towards single women — just his luck, it seems. I had a chance to corner him with some questions about what it’s like from the other side of the skirt, so to speak. What I got back was a very frank, honest, and sometimes bawdy look at what it’s like to date a single mother.
Interested?   

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Hello, there, single mom. How you doing? Staring at your empty pocket where the holidays burned a big hole?

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Rent in DC is insane. I don’t see how people can make ends meet. I certainly can’t! So this week, I’m off to the hallowed halls of the DC Government to see what kind of help I can qualify for, and start there. Yes, obviously, I’d prefer to have a job that covers my expenses AND allows me to save. I’m not holding my breath. I had a great, long-term temp assignment that thankfully paid enough to save up, so I’ll be able to pay the rent and utilities come January 1 without having to borrow money from my folks! But I have no cushion …read more

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At around 2:30 this morning, I finally went to bed. The train table was assembled, but I didn’t bother with setting up the track. Too complicated for tired old me. All the presents from Santa were wrapped and under the tree, the fixin’s for a zuchini and onion fritatta were ready to be mixed together and popped in the oven. The house was clean — or rather, the dust was swept under the rug and the couch — and the kid was sleeping like a log. 7AM came far, far too soon.
What also came far too soon was the first …read more

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I’ve just finished putting together the kid’s train table, thanks grammy and grandpa! But I’m too tired to deal with track. Rats. I put it together in his bedroom while he slept, and he didn’t so much as sigh. There’s one advantage to being single: you don’t have to argue with anyone on how to assemble the presents. Put together his bike the other day, too — thanks, mami et dadi!
And I got to eat all of Santa’s cookies and drink his (lowfat) eggnog. I didn’t have to share. They were all my favorite cookies. And since there was never any question …read more

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I have received so many gifts since we returned to the US. Katherine’s gift of clothes helped me walk into my temp assignments with my heat held high. Kat and Matt, and later Renee, with their generous offer to let us stay with them til we got on our feet. And their kids, who offered instant love and companionship. And to Lisa and Renee, and so many others, whose big boy clothes are keeping my kid in style! And warm! To Ruth, thank you for the bright and cheery boy sheets, Kat and Matt again for the bed and wardrobe …read more

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I wonder if every holiday will be like this: even through the pleasure of having the King of Everything around, I’m haunted by the spectre of Next Year. Next year, my son will be with his father somewhere far away, and I will be without the light of my life for the first time since he was born.
I try hard not to but I can’t help thinking about that. I can’t see, right now, how I’ll spend next Christmas any other way but in tears. Am I the only one? Anyone out there, tell me. Does it get any easier? …read more

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