a beautiful piece on the men who choose a child
I’ve mentioned Peter Ehrlich before. He very kindly sent me a link to his latest piece in The Star.
Peter’s mother was a single mother who did everything she could to make ends meet, including collecting bottles for the rebate. In today’s economy, I think we’re all going to find that a second and third stream of income is going to become critical… I know that I’m looking for ways to supplement my income so I can afford the life my son (and I) deserve.
But Peter’s essay isn’t about his mother, really. It’s about the man who chose to become his father.
When I was 5 years old, I told my mother, “I want a daddy” and a year later I was sitting on Gunther Ehrlich’s lap.
She asked, “How would you like Gunther to be your father?” Without hesitation, I said, “Yes.” When I found out we shared the same birthday, Dec. 6, the deal was spiritually sealed.
Until meeting him I had never fished, seen stars in the sky, walked in the woods or visited a zoo.
Gunther Ehrlich took me everywhere and introduced me to a new and beautiful world that I explored with unbridled joy.
What kind of a man chooses to be a father to someone else’s child? Peter includes a lovely list of qualities that make up such a man. My favorite? “Finds joy in giving to children because the torch he wants to pass on isn’t defined by his last name, but rather the quality of love he feels a natural desire to impart.”
Oh, Peter. You are a lucky boy, indeed.
Tags: peter ehrlich, step-father, Toronto StarRelated Stories
POSTED IN: love
4 opinions for a beautiful piece on the men who choose a child
Leslie
Mar 18, 2008 at 9:54 am
Nothing like crying at your desk :P What great a great piece. I’m lucky enough to have one of those dads by choice & it’s a refreshing reminder of other great ones out there.
Kelly
Mar 18, 2008 at 11:03 am
I really commend these men. It reminds me of that Brad Paisley song, Didn’t Have To Be. Look at the lyrics. It gets me every time:
When a single mom goes out on a date with somebody new
It always winds up feeling more like a job interview
My momma used to wonder if she’d ever meet someone
Who wouldn’t find out about me and then turn around and run
I met the man I call my dad when I was five years old
He took my mom out to a movie and for once I got to go
A few months later I remember lying there in bed
I overheard him pop the question and prayed that she’d say yes
And then all of a sudden
Oh, it seemed so strange to me
How we went from something’s missing
To a family
Lookin’ back all I can say
About all the things he did for me
Is I hope I’m at least half the dad
That he didn’t have to be
I met the girl that’s now my wife about three years ago
We had the perfect marriage but we wanted somethin’ more
Now here I stand surrounded by our family and friends
Crowded ’round the nursery window as they bring the baby in
And now all of a sudden
It seemed so strange to me
How we’ve gone from something’s missing
To a family
Lookin’ through the glass I think about the man
That’s standin’ next to me
And I hope I’m at least half the dad
That he didn’t have to be
Lookin’ back all I can say
About all the things he did for me
Is I hope I’m at least half the dad
That he didn’t have to be
Yeah, I hope I’m at least half the dad
That he didn’t have to be
Because he didn’t have to be
You know he didn’t have to be
Mrs Pillsbury
Mar 18, 2008 at 8:37 pm
I have to admit that Peter’s story gave me hope in the humankind, not only for what his surrogate Dad did but for the way, he, himself, is living his fatherhood as a single dad. I really just want to applaude men like him (are there others out there, please speak out!).
p.s. (once again, sorry if my English isn’t that great…as a francophone, I’m doing my best to keep up with the fact that writing in a second language when it involves emotions, isn’t the easiest thing to do!)
mommypie
Mar 19, 2008 at 1:12 am
Thank you for this - Peter’s words, in combination with the Brad Paisley lyrics sent me over the edge. I hope some day my daughter’s lucky enough to have such a man in her life.
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