give your children something to be proud of…
So, as promised.
The King of Everything had his second Tai Kwan Do lesson on Saturday morning.
I nearly cried.
He was the second youngest in the class, and he took it so seriously. This is the kid that makes me feel like I have Tourrettes, endlessly repeating the same words over and over and… “Put it down. Put it down. Put it down. Come here come here come here come here what did I say? nonononononono! What were you thinking? waitwaitwaitwaitwait”
It’s enough to make me nuts. I think it might just do so in the not to very distant future. But in the meantime, I saw a side of my child I rarely witness in the less than three hours a day we get to spend together. He was still. He was focussed. He was challenged, and rose to the challenge again and again, improving each time he tried to get it right. It was a wonder to behold. My son. The one who never shuts up, is never still, won’t do anything you ask without arguing about it first (positive parenting would call it ‘negotiating’ but they’d be wrong). He remembered to bow in and bow out, said, “Yes, sir, no sir,” whenever an instructor asked him a question. And he was pretty darned good at it.
I knew he’d love this, with his penchant for knights and superheroes and policemen and firemen. I had hoped it would give him confidence, pride and focus. I’m expecting a lot from a martial arts class, but I know from personal experience that they give a lot. I still wish I could go back to my Sifu’s school up in Kensington, but Maryland is just too far away and it’s impossible to get there with a child and without a car.
If there is something your child loves, find a way for them to channel that love into a skill, into a tangible manifestation of grace and excellence. If you have a dramatic kid, find a drama camp or take special classes at the local theater. Encourage any interest your child has, and that kid will grow to have confidence in his or her abilities.
And if you are the single mother of a boy who worships heroes, think about martial arts. There was something breathtaking about watching him in the company of athletic, grown men and ambitious boys without women fussing and coddling over him like we tend to do sometimes.
Tags: martial-arts, self-esteemRelated Stories
POSTED IN: fitness
4 opinions for give your children something to be proud of…
FeeFiFoto
Oct 29, 2007 at 12:47 pm
Keep up with the TKD. My son, Robespierre, has been taking TKD for three years and it’s had a marvelous effect on him. About 40% of the kids in the school have or act as if they have ADD, and many of them are rude, obnoxious or unable to sit still. Robey has shined in these classes every step of the way; he’s gained self respect and the respect of others, and he’s gained the ability to concentrate seriously on a task. The weekend before Thanksgiving he’s testing for his black belt along with about 20 other students, both kids and adults. To prepare for the test all the candidates have to write five essays, perform community service, help warm up and lead classes, and mentor other students. The test itself takes almost six hours; among other things they have to do 1000 jumping jacks, 500 situps and 200 pushups, as well as all the forms and combinations. I’m so grateful to these people for helping raise my child, and I’m deeply proud of and awed by Robey.
Kelly
Oct 29, 2007 at 1:41 pm
I can totally relate to having Parental Tourrettes. LOL, I find myself always repeating everything to my pre-teen daughter. The most common one is “go to bed go to bed go to bed go to bed”. She always seems to be in the middle of something. Gr.
As for providing outlets, I think that’s great. My daughter did Tae Kwon Do for about a year and loved it. The only reason I took her out is because the teacher was a big fat scam artist who tried to get as much money as he could out of me. I hear they are common in that business, which is unfortunate, because with the right teacher, it can be such a great experience for kids.
Anyway, she’s been doing gymnastics for 4 years and loves it. The other day we were talking about how we were going to fit a particular new thing into her schedule and my mom said “Maybe you should quit gymnastics.” We both gasped and looked at her like she was out of her mind. I love that she reacted that way. It showed how much a part of her life it has become.
Darrell Coulter
Mar 4, 2008 at 9:19 pm
it so awesome to see moms take a proactive approach to finding out what their child’s interest are. I work with a lot of single mothers who struggle with that. great post.
christina
Mar 4, 2008 at 9:29 pm
Thanks, Darrell! And I’m going to check out your site!
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