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Solo Mother

How I spent my Valentine’s Day

by christina on February 15th, 2007

Love isn’t overrated. Oh no. But the pressure to express love, and prove that you are loved, is, well… unnecessary. Don’t get me wrong, I <3 Valentine’s Day, with all its flowers, and chocolates, and cute cards and conversation hearts. Oh I do!

But those of you out there who are single this year because your marriage was flawed? Give yourself a valentine, and be kind to yourself. Love yourself. Reflect upon those parts of you that added to the destruction of your marriage, forgive yourself for it, and find a way to improve. Fix yourself. Reflect upon those parts of your relationship that well, your spouse didn’t make any easier… and forgive him for them.

Give your children a valentine, too. Allow them to love their parents, equally, if separately. Listen to them in all things, no matter what your personal feelings about your ex might be. This goes for those among us who have lost a beloved spouse to death, leaving us widows and widowers. Allow your children to honor and remember the one who left.

So I spent a lovely Valentine’s Day at home, with ice cream and truffles, a horror movie on the laptop, a long conversation with a fellow single parent that soothed my soul and put to rest some hells I was putting myself through, needlessly. I am another step closer to whole, and for that, I will always be grateful.

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POSTED IN: love

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