I’m just going to let it all hang out for a minute, ok, single moms?
This seems to come and go in cycles: Worst. Mother. Ever.
I don’t know what I’d do without my parents. They give me that much-needed sanity break, and were so absolutely here for me when I got sick and had to do the surgery thing, and the recovery thing, and the exhaustion thing which I’m still not over. I imagine, if I weren’t so close to my folks, geographically and emotionally, I’d try to create a group house with a few mothers and a bunch of children, and we’d all try to manage somehow.
-I hate mornings. This kid of mine has an almost pathological NEED TO PLAY. ALL THE TIME. Which is not condusive to the other things that need to happen in the morning. If only our mornings were half as amusing as Elizabeth Bear’s wrasslings with her cat, I’d at least be able to laugh on the way out the door. But no. My life with the King of Everything is more like an old Bill Cosby routine:
-Put your clothes on, please.
***
They are laid out on your bed. Put your clothes on, please.
***
-What are you supposed to be doing?
Putting my clothes on.
-What are you doing?
Seeing how far my zizi can stretch.
-PUT YOUR CLOTHES ON. NOW. QUIT PLAYING WITH THAT THING FOR THE LOVE OF PETE.
Who’s Pete?
-*top of head blows off*
Seriously. Every morning it’s a struggle. He’s tired. He wants to play with his puzzle. He wants to watch cartoons. He wants to play video games. What he’s too young to understand is that the time he wastes not doing what he HAS to do is just eating up all the time he would have had to do what he wanted to do… if he’d only just gotten up and put on the five pieces of clothing he had to wear! I’m tired of having to raise my voice to get his attention.
This morning, when he started with me, I simply told him that I was leaving the house at 7:30, and he was coming with me in whatever he had managed to put on… and if that meant he went to school stark naked this morning, so be it, but I couldn’t imagine they would let him do the class photo out of uniform.
He got dressed.
If I can think of any ways to make the morning easier — and I already lay out our clothes the night before, pack our bags, and plan breakfast — I’ll let you know. And vice versa. Please. I’m begging you. Cause sanity in the morning is a precious thing that’s not easy to come by.
Tags: Bill-Cosby, discipline, Elizabeth-Bear, morning-routineRelated Stories
POSTED IN: parenting
14 opinions for I’m just going to let it all hang out for a minute, ok, single moms?
Amy
Oct 18, 2007 at 11:12 pm
Ohmygoodness! It’s been the same at my house! We make the bus by seconds each morning & the pressure of getting us there on time is making me hate myself. I was actually going to post something like this on my blog, too. It’s killing me and I don’t know what to do.
Im going to be checking back to see what sort of suggestions you receive
Jennifer
Oct 19, 2007 at 3:02 am
Sometimes I’m so happy I’m lucky enough to be able to unschool. Still I get your issue. Cedar hates the car for some reason. He hates going anywhere. Like if you told him he was going to the biggest and best video game store and they were giving away free games and toys and money he’d still complain on the way there and back. If you take books, the gameboy, food, everything this child still wants to not go. And he’s not a carsick kid he just hates sitting in the car. It’s sooo frustrating.
As to the morning issue — could KOE sleep in his school clothes? (seriously, what would it hurt). Does he like school? Maybe that’s the issue.
Caryn
Oct 19, 2007 at 4:39 am
I’m not there yet (my little one is barely 4 months) so I have no practical tips to give you although my friend with 3 has the luxury of help and I think that with 3 under 3 that’s a definite must!
robiewankenobie
Oct 19, 2007 at 10:48 am
oh, i’ve taken them nekkid all the way up to the school doors. h? man. he didn’t dwadle for a year after that. c was unphased. dagnabit. plus? i felt creepy and weird. i’m not fond of humiliating my kids to prove a point, or to be right.
okay, so what works for us on a regular basis is this: no one gets breakfast until they are dressed head to toe.
FeeFiFoto
Oct 19, 2007 at 11:05 am
I’m voting for sleeping in school clothes. Their clothes always look like they slept in them anyway.
Ginny
Oct 19, 2007 at 11:47 am
Mornings can be tough & stressful. I have been there! I still am actually, just not with the playing as much. Can you maybe wake him a few minutes earlier so he can have maybe 5 or 10 minutes to play. I also still help my 1st grader get dressed most mornings. Otherwise she’d be goofing off or laying around. If I’m not right there watching.
Kelly
Oct 19, 2007 at 2:10 pm
I think the idea of waking up a little earlier so he can have a little play time might be good. One thing I’ve had to do is have a rule that the TV stays off until she’s ready, because she totally zones out. But she’s older now (11) and does a pretty good job of getting ready for school. Church is another issue. She hates it, and although she won’t admit it, she’s 1,000 times slower on Sundays than any other day of the week, and we are always late. I’m not sure what to do about it myself.
christina
Oct 19, 2007 at 2:19 pm
LOL I love all the suggestions, but…
He gets up at 7AM and complains that he’s too tired, he doesn’t want to get up. (I can’t get him to fall alseep earlier than 8PM, though I try) We leave the house at 7:30, 7:45 to get to school on time. If I give him five minutes to play, he wails that he wants more. He doesn’t transition easily from one thing to the next. I’m just going to have to hold my breath and tough it out.
He would freak if I told him to sleep in his clothes. Not the way it’s done. He’d absolutely lose his mind. And besides, then he’d start whining about not being able to wear his space jammies.
Can’t win!
Jennifer
Oct 19, 2007 at 3:15 pm
Well, if the sleeping in his clothes deal won’t work maybe try aromatherapy. You could use it at night to relax him (lavender, cedar, etc) and use a separate diffuser for mornings with grapefruit and peppermint — stimulating scents. I use aromatherapy with Cedar and he loves it.
buterflymom
Oct 19, 2007 at 3:37 pm
maybe try making a game out of it. when my daughter was little we made a chart and put stickers on it…….when she earned enough stickers so got something or got to go somewhere fun.
No TV before getting ready or removing the thing he really wants. having a good talk about it before bed what you expect in the morning and the consequences…………and following through.
i always have trouble with the follow through but it’s important.
good luck and hang in there. it’s all a phase and what’s a problem now will go away. something new will come up.
:)
Kit
Oct 20, 2007 at 3:10 pm
I had a 7 yo who was like this.
I set a timer each morning and a pictorial list of what had to be done before the timer went off.
If he lost the race, I took a category of toys out of his life and stuck them in my room.
(example, all the car related toys, all the building toys ie:legos/blocks)
He had to win the race for two days IN A ROW to get them back.
By the end of week one, he lost the race three times, and did not win anything back.
The weekend was hell - mystuffmystuffmystuff !
The following week he only lost once -Wednesday.
He lost sporadically after that, but toughing out the first 2 weeks was the hard bit - sticking to my promise that the toys were GONE until he earned them back, but after that ?
He learned all on his own that flying thru morning chores gave him MORE time for play.
christina
Oct 20, 2007 at 6:13 pm
I think we’re going to have to try that. I’ve tried humor, I’ve tried supervision, bribing, praise, hollering…
I’m off to the store for a winde up kitchen timer tomorrow. Thanks!
angel
Oct 24, 2007 at 2:30 pm
getting ready the night before is the best thing for me…
his clothes and mine- making sure we both know where all the stuff is we need. and i get up and start getting ready a little before him so i can keep an eye on him…
christina
Oct 24, 2007 at 8:42 pm
Yeah, I just have to realize that he’s going to need supervision for a while. It’s so… annoying. LOL
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