My mad organization skillz. Let me show you them
The summer has been footloose and fancy-free, for the most part.Or as much as a single mother working oh so much more than full-time can make it. Camp turned out to be optional, bolstered by my mother’s availability and brilliant ability to create fun such as the King of Everything shouldn’t resist. Chores, breakfast, a dozen little details weren’t as firm as they could have been. We didn’t stick the landing on bedtimes, either.
But beneath it all, we’re craving a bit of structure. I’m setting my sights on my return from the DNC and RNC as the start for a new beginning, with chore charts, rules, behavior boot camp, strict bedtime. We’ll sit together and eat dinner. We’ll practice letters and pattern recognition with pennies, write letters to his favorite book characters and add and subtract.
There are 12,000 unique readers here on SoloMother. Some of you must be human. Of the dozen of you who comment regularly, I’m grateful. I’d love to hear from all of you: what works for your ‘unbalanced’ households? How do you get out the door in the morning? How do you get dinner on the table at night? What brilliant schemes do you employ to talk a screaming toddler off the roof, or a sullen teenager into smiling?
Inquiring single mothers want to know.
Tags: organization, raising-kids, rules, single-mom, single-mother, structureRelated Stories
POSTED IN: ritual
10 opinions for My mad organization skillz. Let me show you them
Kate
Aug 20, 2008 at 8:05 am
One thing I do to help get out in the morning is something my Mom used to do and I thought she was a loon…I get out everything for breakfast in the morning - dishes, silverware, mugs, cups etc. I also premake my lunch and my sons as best I can. Things that go in baggies or containers go right in the lunchbox or are placed in the refridge for easy grabbing in the morning.
I also make a lot of dishes over the weekend so when I get home at night all I have to do is heat it up!
christina
Aug 20, 2008 at 10:04 am
Kate, thanks, you’re so right. Luckily my kid wears a uniform to school, so getting dressed is a breeze. I used to lay out what he wanted to wear the night before, and it cut down on changing his mind and dawdling. Thanks for the tips!
Kelly
Aug 20, 2008 at 4:43 pm
For dinner, I try to choose 2 simple recipes a week and make them on our less busy nights. For the rest of the week, when we are rushing to activities and the like, we have leftovers from those recipes or something quick, like hot dogs or hamburger helper. Or, yes, fast food!
I have been terrible about not making my 12 yo daughter do any chores, and I want to change that because I really am struggling to keep up with it all on my own. Someone gave me a great idea I’d like to try… give her a list of 7 weekly chores. She has to do 1 a day, and it’s up to her which one that is. I think it’s great for a start, and kids are much more likely to do what you want if they get to take part in the decision-making.
C~
Aug 20, 2008 at 10:21 pm
I found out that kids crave consistency which can be a difficult thing to maintain in a single parent home. But each evening, well most evenings, I give my toddler a bath, and we follow the bed time routine of reading two books of his choosing, followed by nite prayers, and several hugs/kisses and the assurance that I will be in to check on him later. The kid is usually asleep in 10 minutes. Plus, he’s not allowed to get out of bed in the morning until his alarm clock beeps.
Janna
Aug 20, 2008 at 11:05 pm
Luckily, the daycare my 3 boys attend feeds them dinner and they are usually just finishing up when i get there so I really only have to worry about me and I’m content with toast. If I feel like it I will cook dinner at home and the boys will usually eat again. I wish I had thier metabolism as they are all so thin. well except the 2 year old but I love his chunky belly :-0
Monday’s and Wednesdays are gym nights, I meet with my trainer and at the same time the middle one does boxing. The oldest didn’t like it so he has to do his homework then. By the time we get home, its just enough time to check backpacks, have the older two do the required 20 minutes of reading for school then its bedtime. We all do showers in the morning. If I know we have to leave early then I will have them shower at night. Same goes with laying the clothes out the night before. I keep a basket by the front door for shoes so they don’t get lost. We had way too many mornings where we were late because shoes could not be found. I also keep a hook nest to the front door for me keys because of the same issue (I’m just as bad as they are at losing things half the time) so as I walk out the door I grab the keys then shut the door.
Michelle S
Aug 20, 2008 at 11:44 pm
Hello, this is the first of what I’m sure will be many more visits.
Balancing three kids and three different schools is tricky, but we have some tricks. Each child has a different wake-up time, so the bathroom time is staggered. My youngest daughter eats breakfast at school. Lots of dinners begin in the crockpot. My house is not as tidy as it once was, but as long as it looks clear from the front door, I’m pretty satisfied. Making the teen smile - that is a work in progress.
Leslie
Aug 21, 2008 at 10:09 am
This is only the first week of school for us so I feel like I’m doing so great but in about a month I’ll be pulling my hair out :) I packed lunches for the whole week on Sunday & did paper bags so they’re all labeled and ready to go. I think I’m in love with paper sacks - no more scary “what smell will hit me when I open the lunchbox” moments.
I bought a bunch of the mini breakfast cereal boxes so he can get his own cereal while I’m getting ready or to eat on the car ride.
We have a quick meal at least once a week - spagetti or something which also gives us plenty leftovers. I usually try to make a couple pounds of ground beef at once so I can have the other half in the fridge for making up sloppy joes or tacos. Definitely a lot of “one dish” meals.
I hung up a clothes organizer in the bathroom and put clothes in each shelf so he can find something each day and there’s not overwhelming choices. I just stick stuff in there as soon as the laundry’s folded. I should really hang one up for myself.
We’re struggling with bedtime, it’s nice having those extra hours of daylight and hang out time in the summer. Our nights are so abrubt now.
Best of luck mamas!
texasholly @ June Cleaver Nirvana
Aug 21, 2008 at 11:53 am
If you can get to the place where everything has a place (and it took me a long time to get there for a brief 5 minute period because then new stuff comes in that needs a place) then the kids can become responsible for returning things to the proper place.
I have places for snacks so they can help themselves after asking permission.
All shoes have a place by the door to the garage.
Homework stays in backpacks until completion and then returned to backpack which sits by the back door.
Lunch boxes are refilled when emptied and placed in fridge.
I have school supply boxes at home labeled with names so no pencils, crayons, markers, etc. have to be transported back and forth between school and home. We were getting a lot lost in the transportation.
There is a tag on the backpack with a list of what should be inside. Each child is responsible to make sure everything is there.
Now as for me and actually getting dinner on the table….UGH.
mary
Aug 25, 2008 at 9:58 am
I dont have any concrete “tips” other than whatever else you do, dont forget to pat yourself on the back when you finally get to the office and sit in your chair. Getting the two of you up, fed, dressed and where you need to be is a MAJOR accomplishment, in my opinion. The fact that I can actually do it fills me with pride, seriously.
Getting my 3 year old boy up and out is so challenging, and I do it by myself. The ONE time-saver I do is get the coffeemaker ready before I go to bed. Once I have that first cup, I can deal with whatever happens.
Keep up the excellent writing, and now thanks to your review, I want to see that new woody allen movie.
: )
Mary
Eileen
Aug 25, 2008 at 12:48 pm
I just started reading the site so don’t know if “unbalanced” is the word I would use chaos is more accurate, but there are a few things I have discovered in the last four years as a single mom (in our now more balanced house) that have helped with my three school aged girls. First, Clean laundry by Sunday night. This allows for five outfits to be hung in closet for them to chose over the week. Obviously there are more than five outfits but on one side of the closet - I know there are appropriate school clothes and matching sox which is what used to get me 2) Food - I go by the monthly freezer cooking plan and that allows me to pull out five meals from the freezer that can thaw in the fridge and I just have to heat up meals during the week. Actually the monthly cooking is great girlfriend time for me since I cook with a friend, that I might not otherwise get to spend time with. We are actually out of the house four nights of the week, so our “dinner” is packed in a cooler and we heat it up at the pool or dance studio and avoid the cost and poor nutrition of fast food. Also school lunches are packed the night before while cleaning up the kitchen- even young kids can bag the sandwiches! 3) Clutter - designate a place for backpacks, lunch boxes, and school forms. Face it the paperwork breeds and if left alone you will have more clutter than you want. I have a three stacker plastic desk organizer and their papers, permission slips, etc. go there like an in-box and I sign them all place them back in back packs, all lined up against the foyer wall - probably a fire hazard, but it works for us. My guys know our life is crazy - but they also know for me to accomplish all that we as a family do that is “our” option it is either crazy meals from the cooler, or no after school activities and we can sit at a table with place mats (which we do on Sundays) I think that they have a realistic awareness of what everyone has to contribute for each of them to be so involved i.e. priorities, patience, support and a sense of our family by being there for their sisters at activities.
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