Solo Mother

Serenity for the single mom (dads welcome, too)

by christina on July 14th, 2007

I do not want what I have not got.

For so long, I’ve been using that phrase with a touch of irony… perhaps even bitterness. A chant of self-denial, a chastisement for what I can’t have, what is out of my grasp. what has been denied me.

This afternoon, as I kissed my napping boy on the cheek, the phrase came to me again. “I do not want what I have not got.” Instead of bitterness, my heart was filled to the brim with peace and happiness. If I don’t have it, I don’t need it. If I want it, and it is right and good, it will come. My life is replete, bursting with all the amazing things that have happened in these past eight months and counting, and the clenched fist that bound my heart in misery, fear, and loathing has loosened its grip to let love and laughter in.

I do not want what I have not got.

It’s a prayer of thanksgiving for the kind of peace that comes with acceptance, it’s a reverence for all the good in the life you have, it’s a gentle remonstration to be grateful for the positive things… it’s a quiet voice whispering all the negative and hurtful things in your past that are no more. It is also a hopeful casting out upon the world’s winds that trusts, and knows that whatever it is you truly need in this life will come to you, in the fullness of time. Waiting is. Time will be when waiting is filled.

This is my Saturday gift to all of you, single mothers and single fathers alike. Do not want what you have not got. And do so joyfully.

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POSTED IN: Selp-help