Solo Mother

I met a woman recently… a beautiful, vibrant, sassy woman. I don’t take to people immediately, but I liked her on sight. I was going to give her a quick belly dancing lesson one Sunday night.
She was found strangled to death in her own apartment this week. She was a single woman. She was 38.
Women, if you are walking home alone, walk in the street if you have to. Don’t walk close to entryways or cut through alleys. Call and talk to someone on the phone until you are inside safe with the doors locked. Spend money on a taxi. …read more

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Significant occurrences seem to be slipping past, unremarked, nearly unnoticed. I wrote my 1000′th post sometime last week. I marked the passing of my third year of singlemotherdom a few weeks ago and almost missed it! And I’ve been writing here on b5media for so long that my domain name registration expired last night!! And no one noticed! and we had to wake people up all over the place to fix it. Go figure.
And last night I was sitting in my favorite jazz haunt, drinking a glass of wine after a long night attending a  gala dinner celebrating an organization …read more

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I’ve been doing some hard, late-night soul searching and personal beating up lately. No matter how far outside my personal predilections I roam, it seems I choose the wrong man.  The one lightbulb flash of realization I’ve had after all this mulling over romance and Coffee Coffee Buzz Buzz Buzz ice cream — while admittedly, secondarily caffeinated and therefore subject to continued scrutiny at lower levels of hype — is that I have never really dated. I’ve drifted from committed relationship to committed relationship and allowed the man’s feelings for me to dictate how I felt for him. When my last serious dude asked …read more

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So, single mothers, which relationship are you in? May you find your turtle, and leave the brontosaurus behind.

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SingleMommyHood is wondering when you should out yourself. You know. Tell your date about your blog. What do you think?
And did you tell your ex about your blog? Did he or she find it? Is that a source of contention in your relationship?
I guess if I wrote more about dating and sex, I’d have more readers. But damn. I like having a little bit of privacy unless it’s funny, and you wouldn’t be able to identify the guys I’ve been on first dates with. Two of my first date guys are getting married soon, and I’m thrilled for them.
What say …read more

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On Saturday, the King of Everything will be six.
I have been planning his party for months. Everything is perfect.

Everything, that is, except the weather. It’s going to rain on the Kite Festival. And me with 14 pocket kites, 12 bubble blows, wrist ribbons and foam glider planes. It was going to be gorgeous. It was going to be gorgeous. It was… well, it’s going to be rained on, and we’ll have to move to Plan B.
Which is not, incidentally, at my little apartment. Aw, hell to the no, son. I was talking to a friend who proclaimed that all people …read more

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Her blog is here: Splatters of the Heart
Go check her out, and tell her Solomother from Single Parent Connection says hi.

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Yes, once upon a time I really did have to look up MILF in the Urban Dictionary.
Amy Sue Nathan is writing about an article in the Chicago Tribune called, Dating… with Children. Amy notes that she’s decided to let dating take a back seat to child-raising. What do you think? Are you the kind of single mother who’s going to let go of romance til the nest is empty, or will you try to balance love and little ones again?
Ms. Single Mama has found a guy whose reaction to the inevitable, “BTW, I have a kid” line was, “no problem.” …read more

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When my marriage fell apart, and I’d moved back to the United States, lived in Other People’s Houses, worn Other Peoples’ Clothes, found a job, found a home, got my feet under me and pulled my head out of the day to day ess aych eye tee of making ends meet… well, let’s just say, after two years, I might just be ready to date again.
I’ve been on an endless round of first dates, just to keep my toe in the water. And let me tell you, there are some very. interesting. people running around our Nation’s Capital. Very. Interesting. …read more

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Looking over the dating sites, I always lean towards the guys who identify themselves as fathers. I try to read between the lines… is this one eating a baguette and a glass of wine for dinner because he’s a hopeless romantic or a lazy, lousy cook? Is this one looking for a soul mate or a replacement for what he lost in his divorce? Is he really over her? Are his kids nice, or spoiled?
But when it comes right down to it, after a thousand first dates with various fathers, divorcés, and men who never married, I can tell you …read more

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