Solo Mother

This no home to go to thing is getting very. very. old. I feel like I’m stuck in a Shakespeare loop: Tomorrow and tomorrow and tomorrow and tomorrow and…
Ouch. This has been very disruptive, for both me and my son, but I think it’s been harder on me. My kid has my parents, and he’s been spending the night over there as much as possible, especially on school nights because let’s face facts, I don’t have a washer and I don’t have a kitchen, so clean uniforms and a packed lunch are rather difficult right now.
But I’m thinking about …read more

2 Comments

Laura A. Munson’s recent piece in the New York Times is breathtaking in its simple, brutal honesty, in all the things she does not say in the spare lines that lay down a tale that began with the blood-freezing words her husband used to try to escape his own pain: I don’t love you anymore.
His words came at me like a speeding fist, like a sucker punch, yet somehow in that moment I was able to duck. And once I recovered and composed myself, I managed to say, “I don’t buy it.” Because I didn’t.
Reading her story, I was thrown …read more

5 Comments

This article from Reuters brings tears to my eyes. “Battered Afghan wives opt for divorce instead of suicide“:
After regular beatings, torture and attempted murder by her husband, 35-year-old Zahra tried to burn herself to death to escape her marriage. Then she learned of a safer option: divorce.

No Comments

Tonight after dinner on the roof beneath a rainbow sky, my mother played some old videos of the King of Everything. We watched and laughed as this cute, little, little guy did science ’spermints at the kitchen sink. Mom took the video maybe two years ago. I miss that little kid.
When my ex and I split up, he kept the video camera… and all the videos I’d taken of the King of Everything since he was a baby. I haven’t seen them since. Videos of how he used to crawl like lightning to find the vacuum cleaner, crowing with laughter at …read more

5 Comments

I have been in a crappy mood for days. I even admitted as much to my mother thismorning as she poured me a cup of high-test coffee while my son helped his grandfather restain the upstairs deck.
Today was baseball. Today, i’d meet the other woman.  I’d got to watch my boyfriend’s son play in a tournament game. The ex would be there.
I was nervous.

3 Comments

You know how the fire department tells you to change the batteries in  your smoke detector twice a year, when we turn our clocks back and forward for Daylight Savings Time? Well, it’s a good idea to get your free credit reports once a year, and it seems to me that pegging it to tax time will make it easy to remember to do.
Money doesn’t make much sense to me. Combine that with ADD and well, you’ve got a woman who finds it difficult to pay bills on time. Which is silly, because there’s a pretty simple formula that says: …read more

2 Comments

Well.
The papers are telling us that the Boss has caused a breakup. No, not the boss. The Boss. You know. Bruce Springsteen.  Apparently, he’s been having an affair with a woman he met at the gym. And her husband has filed for divorce, citing Bruce as the ‘other man’.
And some poor guy in Connecticut is divorcing his wife. Reason? She handcuffed herself to him. Because it was the only way she could have a conversation with him. After seven years of marriage, you’d think they’d have gotten better at communicating! But no, according to this little tidbit, “Police had to …read more

4 Comments

I don’t have any thoughts on this. I don’t have any good advice. I’ve got an ex halfway around the world who can’t afford child support, and me without the money to buy a web cam or a new laptop to replace my DEATH BY OJ one or even to buy a new still cam to replace the one that mysteriously disappeared after Halloween (boo hiss), it’s not easy to keep the ex up to date on the critter. And since he’s nearly six, the milestones aren’t as often or dramatic. I told the ex when the King of Everything …read more

3 Comments

 
Well, you know, Google apps. are wonderful little toys for productivity. And eventually, I’ll get around to reorganizing this list so the most important thing to do isn’t the last thing on my list.
But at least it has made the to-do list, right?
My stomach hurts. Finally getting divorced just gives my ex another opportunity to be nasty to me, and make me feel like kaka.  At least the way things have been (not) going lately, we just ignore each other as much as possible.
Rip off the BANDAID.  It’s time.

7 Comments

I’ve been doing this single parent thing for over two years now. Yes, it’s easier, because I’ve got our ‘how are we going to live day to day’ questions solved, but it’s harder, because now I’ve got some breathing space to wonder, what next?
Well, first thing is to get divorced. Neither of us has any money, and for some reason, the whole thing is overwhelming to me. NO, I don’t want to reconcile. That’s ridiculous. We are all three of us much healthier now that we’re not stuck in Hell together. And there is no way I could provide the …read more

2 Comments