wasn’t technology supposed to make our lives simpler?
I’m arguing with my computer most days, it seems, and the technology on my phone has outstripped me. I wouldn’t know how to fix my car if I had one, and I’ve just about given up on understanding anything that requires any sort of electrical power source. I give up.
When I was a kid, my mother didn’t have a car. We didn’t have cable television, and mobile phones were a Get Smart gadget. I always had change in my pocket for a pay phone, but there were no beepers, pagers, GPS systems or (grin) invisible fences. We got around. We communicated. We trusted each other to be where we were supposed to be, when we were supposed to be there. When someone went to the grocery store, that was that. There was no last-minute frantic phone call for the three things forgotten on the list.
But when I leave the office for a meeting, I always pocket my electronic leash, the gizmo gadget they’ve given me that has Web, e-mail and phone all in one, with more bells and whistles than I know how to turn on. Or off, for that matter. My son’s school thinks nothing of calling me at 3:10 in the afternoon to let me know that after-care has been cancelled and I have to come pick him up by 3:15–they assume that a) they can reach me instantly on my mobile, anywhere, anytime and b) I can just hop in my car and be there in a flash. I spend more time trying to get the programs on my computer to do what I want them to, than I actually do working, some days. I’ve gone back to thinking on paper, and entering it into the computer when I’m good and ready to share with the rest of the group. I walk to the grocery store and I do my dishes by hand (the dishwasher, quite frankly, sucks). I’d like to move closer to work and find a school nearby where we can live our lives on foot, and gain all that disjointed time Americans usually spend in their cars, and actually use the minutes to enjoy the journey rather than curse how long it always takes to get there.
If you’re feeling frazzled and a little lost, out of touch, and downright crazed, you might want to unplug a little. Instead of trying to hurry up and cram more into your schedule, how about simplifying? Scale it back. What is so important that it just has to get done right this very minute? And take a look at the life you’re scheduling for your kids. Do they get any down time, any hanging out doing nothing time? Believe it or not, that’s important time.
Retro Research is a fascinating social experiment. Take it back to a ’simpler’ time and see what it’s like to live on a cash budget, without a cell phone. No dryer, no dishwasher. No color television. What do you think you’d learn? On the days when I let go and slow down, I feel so much better, so in tune with what I need, what my son needs, and what makes us happy. And believe me, it has nothing to do with plugging in.
Tags: divorce, kid, mental-health, mom, mommy, mother, single-mom, single-mommy, single-mother, stress, time, unplug
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